the artist with ‘portrait of the artist as a cowboy/entertainer-she remembers the snowy mountains
i love walking uphill. aberystwyth ideal for this, cardiff weak on that front, so i seek out stairs!london escalators ideal for hill substitution…anyway, whilst walking i always get idea flow. been a very good show ideas prompter as i went to see andrew the printer today. am making postcards of other work of mine as well as this wonderful photo that mal bennett took of me…it’s all ‘show’ innit!…
have really enjoyed working on this little one. a different kind of painting. good practice whilst making. the way ahead for the moment. have wanted to be doing this kind of work since christmas but had many portraits to do …and enjoyed doing them too.i work in short spurts whilst still re-organizing my studio. such a good feeling. my own domain to play basically. it’s a luxury.
this piece is about 16 X 7cm. it’s amazing how small is as big as big is.scale is a fascinating proposition of problematics.the same as working big but…different.i had decided last year that i needed to work small. all the rational arguments against big pieces…storage at the very least, cost,and- no one buys a big painting as few have the wall space to house it.an intense learning curve about colour, texture, composition etc. great testers for….no!!!!!…bigger pieces!
have just seen the chicken!!!…tomorrow morning,carry on problem solving. it’s been through very many stages. will be interesting to see what i keep and where it might end, some parts that work…no different to big scale.
man dressed as bat, oil on canvas
http://www.nationalgalleries.org/whatson/exhibitions/peter-doig
http://www.nationalgalleries.org/whatson/exhibitions/peter-doig/peter-doig-video
i was very lucky indeed to have been given a travel award to go and see doig’s exhibition in edinburgh last year. initially i didn’t apply for the award as i had decided i would stay put at home all summer and finish my dissertation…on doig.i was unaware that there was a major doig exhibition in edinburgh that summer. it was david fitzjohn who urged me apply despite me saying there was nowhere i could find any doig i hadn’t already seen.i’d missed his tate exhibition but had managed to get to michael werner’s gallery in mayfair in december 2012.
i applied and was given £300 to cover my costs of train and hostel in edinburgh. it was the best value for money £300 i’ll ever know.
hidemi, my husband and i went up for four days during the edinburgh festival. i had finished my dissertation, draft one anyway, so i was free to enjoy.apart from the doig, the festival is somewhere we’d both always intended visiting but never got round to actually getting there.
in fulfilling the award brief, not only did i see doig …twice!..one had to go back,-but we saw singers, choirs, dancers, pianists, guitarists, ..jazz, classical, world,contemporary music, dance of every kind and went to the scottish national gallery of modern art, ate wonderful food and drank some fine wines. all in all a major life and inspiration boost of the very best kind. i feed off it still to this day.
as with any art form/music/performance, seeing and experiencing the real thing is what it’s all about initially.the very fact of making the effort, the pilgrimage, is a necessary ritual for the soul. the inconveniencing oneself from the comfort torpor is always a buzz. simple really.
i am deeply indebted to the gregory family for enabling me to experience this feast of inspiration.
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it’s been interesting trying out this painting. i hadn’t touched any paint for a month since going to madrid, barcelona and taking all my csad studio back home to my own.i haven’t enjoyed being away from daily painting.crude beginnings yesterday. always the question of what do i want to paint. over the past month,i had decided i’d do some abstract and work small.i over-painted an old portrait i did three years ago. i liked the wash and layered effect but i was also wanting to bring in chunkier paint. i also worked on a little block of wood. just starting up with colour again felt crude and alien, but as i worked through the day my choices became more reasoned again. oil is fabulous for happily obeying a turps wipe-out if you don’t want it. i tried thick, chunky oil, smears and wipes, but i always inevitably want to expose some of the thinner,under painting. SO, it’s all about contrast for me at the moment.COLOUR, TEXTURE, JUXTAPOSITION AND CONTRAST. i leave it at that.
yellow ears
quiff…
book in box
box…
stiwdio fi/ my studio
my boys, three wise cowboys – see no, hear no, speak no evil…
shrine detail…
viv and my degree shrine…
step 3…
step 2…
sandy bendelow is a writer/the producer of response times at gas gallery. i got to know her as she was given arts council wales funding to work with a group of performers…dance/music/actors…to create a response time from my paintings. seeing the work that evening made me realize i was ready to tackle a one woman show. it’s been a ten year incubation…their work that evening was inventive, communicative, emotive, witty, poignant,imaginative…inter-disciplinary evening involving many disciplines and -erformers.Unusual to have them all on the same night in the same place.. i’ll have to do it myself…which is the challenge. i’ll be working with sandy bendelow, cai tomos dancer, body movement artist and jan henderson, clown, actress/singer who lives and works in edmonton, canada.i used to sing with jan in an’a cappella’ duo in the late 70’s in edmonton. i had started some performing with her but decided it was time for me to head back to london and find, if i could, william bennett, as a flute teacher. luckily, i did, but that’s another story.
i’ve been considering doing a one-woman show for about ten years now.since that first awareness of wanting to create some performance or other, involving my music and performance…singing, voice work, sounds, flute, keyboard, piano,,,,many elements i went on to study composition with john metcalf only to clearly realize that i didn’t want to particularly compose for others but to be involved in my work myself. i then saw through some arts council funded projects composing and performing/playing with attitude dance company in hereford and then a two-person show with the wonderful cai tomos,dancer, body movement artist, devisor, choreographer extrodinaire…show was called ‘re:’…that was four years ago and following my last show with cai in london, i started a foundation course in fine art and have now,or will officially have completed my fine art degree on june 13th when i get my results.
it was in autumn 2013 , when i did an av room experimental piece of work..not painting…but, encouraged by my tutor hywel to do a talk about my life/play my flute piece. i did a half-hour presentation. paradox was my key word! other than that, i played, sang, did some improvisation as i usually do and told some f my recollections, talked about my feelings about being me. i had no idea what it felt like for the group of students as an audience as it was completely unrehearsed for that moment. hywel’s reaction was immediately ‘tour it!’…nice to hear, i left it at that. georgia said i was just like the lady up for the turner prize…that was a light bulb moment for me… still haven’t got the name from georgia…i’ll fb her today!! ah the powers of fb!..i found it wondrous that there was an audience out there somewhere in some sort of performance groove which i could possibly play to in my way.
so, the follow up of that time in the av room is that, strangely, as these things happen, other people seem to find me out …i decided i would do my one woman show when i was in madrid at the end of april. the sun was shining and i was out of my usual groove. the thought of the ma and being in offices and enclosed spaces,physically if not intellectually just didn’t feel appropriate. enticed by a little taste of travel again, i had to go with the gut instinct.
my three reds in gas gallery
listeners at the response time…
me at me, me and me by me response…
mar responding to the reds…
the poetry duo
james’s response to ‘fish’…
james responding to ‘age + me’…
james’s comic ‘arrival’ piece at the gallery…
response duo poem….
dancers upstairs responding to those responding downstairs…
the story-teller/actress responding…
merran dubb portrait at my aberystwyth exhibition 
dancer and projection to me+red coat
roeddwn yn meddwl am beth ydyw i weithio yn saesneg yn fy meddylie tra’n peintio a ceisio meddwl am beth fyddai fel i weithio drwy gyfrwng y gymraeg yn feddyliol yn unig…popeth drwy’r gymraeg. tybed a fydde hwn yn newid y peintiad a’r dewisiadau byddwn yn eu gwneud. ma hwn yn bwnc diddorol a dweud y gwir achos mi fydde’n brawf anodd iawn i geisio’i brofi yn hollol deg. dwi wedi dod i ben a’r cwrs erbyn heddiw ond mi fydda i yn cario ymlaen a’r blog yma a hefyd blog ychwanegol ar gyfer gweithio ar fy sioe un-fenyw. mae’n rhaid cyfadde fy mod yn teimlo’n wahanol rhywffordd tra’n defnyddio cymraeg yn unig. siarad eto’n wahaol i glywed y gymraeg yn fy mhen. falle rho i dro i’r syniad yma yn y dyfodol.
mae’r syniad yma yn taro ar y cwestiwn, beth yw e i fod yn gymraes ac yn artist gymraeg yng nghymru. ma bod yn gymraes tramor yn brofiad rhydd iawn a dwi wedi cael flynyddoedd felly. rhyddid mewn un ffordd ond eto dyw’r syniad o fod yn gymraes byth yn yng ngadael i. o ran ddod i ben i’r cwrs yn y brif goleg celf yng nghymru yng nghaerdydd, mae’n druenu dweud mae dim ond un athro sy’n siarad cymraeg yn rhygl. i fod yn deg, fel dysgwr, mae andre stitt yn weddol rhygl. medrwn ddweud fod cael y tiwtor yn trafod yng ngwaith yng nghymraeg yn brofiad personol , clir iawn. yn teimlo’n gywir rhywffordd er fy mod ddim yn siarad llawer o gymraeg da ffrindie felly am fod cyn leied o gymru yn y coleg.
un peth sy’n taro yw y ffaith fod bryn terfel yn enw fyd-enwog, ac wedi i syr geraint evans fod o’i flaen, mae ei henwe nhw yn agor drysau ac yn codi arian enfawr, sef y coleg cerdd a drama newydd! digonedd o arian i cerdd ac opera. wel pam lai. mi ddyle fod, a dwi mor ddiolchgar fod hyn yn bodoli…ond, beth an celf…druan o celf…ma angen cymro a chymraes..a mwy eto, i roi cymru celf ar y map er mwyn medru codi arian ar gyfer celf cyfoes nawr!y broblem yw y ffaith fod celf yn hollol agored yn y diwedd, gyda cerdd clasurol, mae’r darne yno’n barod i’w perfformio. handy iawn i’r goreuon fedru llenwi’r gaps sydd yna yn barod iddynt eu llenwi…
reit, dwi wedi dweud y’n rhan, mi orffennaf yn saesneg.
a stuffed springbok from madrid apartment wall….
i was in madrid at the end of april, early may,-now seems centuries ago! stayed in a wonderful airbnb with a dutch artist in tribunal metro area. old part of madrid. best tortilla ever in the cafe up the road, and a superb organic veggie restaurant around the other corner and up the road…rose petal salads!!very good indeed. massive gin and tonics in spain..bucket sized! i digress!!looking back at my books from the past year and oh so many photographs, i am chomping to complete the course so that i can indulge in endless time spent on whatever i want. i have a fabulous assortment of photographs which i want to scrutinize and contemplate new work from them. i’m enjoying laying with words again and writing is beginning to happen with regards to my one-woman show…my current and next big project. i’ll continue to paint whilst devising a one-woman show…wrking title is ‘ human…..this should look like a long arrow, but it’s not….being! so this sort of idea. i’ll use a hyphen for the minute to represent the arrow.human—-being on —–being—–human….it may well change but it seems to be the right title for the moment. i need to put together my first application for an arts council wales grant, hopefully in the next two weeks….i will be working with various people..body, clown,but not red nose clown… movement, sound and with sandy bendelow for script. had signed up for an ma but realized very clearly whilst in madrid i just need to get to practicing asap as opposed to studying about practicing so i have cancelled my place…this feels very right.once i hand in on friday i’ll be back painting and writing my application.
painting is ‘simona in madrid’.marre,the designer with whom we stayed, had collected abandoned taxidermy and had it restored. a wild boar in the hall, a fox running over the kitchen wooden beam and this beautiful springbok next to an equally magnificent goat on the living room wall. all the walls in the old flat were white and these poor stuffed creatures weren’t in the least bit morbid. just very beautiful and i was utterly captivated by the springbok as i am every time i see our friend, simonoa’s face. i suddenly realized after a couple of days that they resembled each other…well, they do to me! and as the artist, i have the right to make that decision!the top that simona wore in the photo immediately grabbed my attention visually. lovely graphic shapes. want to paint her body flat 2D…i may put a rubber plant in the painting too. it loomed beautifully in the corner of the living room. we’ll see.
anniemsuganami 